Ditch The Detox Myths | The Hormone Diva

Ditch the Detox Myths

Detoxing and cleansing have been (and are!) very hot topics. Everyone wants to detox the gunk out of their body, often in the hopes of weight loss, glowing skin and increased energy. You may be wondering: Why doesn’t this happen when I try it?


I hear you- I’ve been there. Over the years I’ve tried many different types of cleanses, including:

  • Mono diet (I ate nothing but apples for a whole day)
  • 10 bottles of supplements detoxes
  • Whole foods detoxes
  • Smoothie-only cleansing
  • And others. . .


My problem with the majority of these programs (save the whole foods cleanses) is that they just don’t work. I feel like shit for the entire time, don’t lose any weight, feel irritable and like I want to scratch my (or someone else’s) eyes out. Not conducive to transformation. Not conducive to happiness. Being grouchy and hungry doesn’t make me happy- it makes me grouchy and hungry.


Did you feel these symptoms on your last detox? Or did hearing about these symptoms stop you from trying a detox? There are a whole host of symptoms people experience on improperly designed cleansing programs. There’s nothing inherently wrong with cleansing, and in fact I wouldn’t be where I am today with my health without them- BUT it shouldn’t feel like punishment. It should be a fun, reflective + transformative ride.


It shouldn’t feel like this:


  1. Aching or stiff joints and muscles
  2. Excessive skin breakouts
  3. Life-interfering fatigue
  4. Family-scaring mood swings
  5. Crying, and crying and crying (unless you need to release some shit)
  6. Libido – what’s that?
  8. Body betrayal
  9. Mind feeling like a foggy night in a horror movie
  10. I wish I could eat a whole tub of ice cream right now. . .and spoon it with potato chips. . .



It should feel like this:


  1. Couple days of mild fatigue or headaches (especially with caffeine withdrawal)
  2. Being a ball of energy
  3. Feeling grounded, calm and content
  4. Radiant joy
  5. Dessert love no longer overcomes me (no willpower needed)
  6. Clothes fitting better
  7. Sleeping like a baby
  8. WOW I’m a sexy lady
  9. Green shit makes me feel great- and now I WANT to eat green shit
  10. It’s a fishnet, push-up bra kind of sexy time with significant other
  11. Aha. . .now I understand my body and how to nourish it
  12. Give the big round belly back to the pregnant ladies
  13. Release of weight that no longer serves you


So how do you know if your program is doing it right?


Detox Tea | The Hormone Diva


3 Ways To Do It Right


  1. Open The Doors


In your body, there are several emunctories, or ‘doors’ of elimination for toxins and waste to get out. They are:

  • Bowels/colon
  • Skin/sweat
  • Lymphatic system
  • Kidneys/urine
  • Menstrual blood – unique to YOU as a woman, an extra monthly release
  • Lungs/breath
  • Liver


For proper and complete cleansing, all of these areas must be open channels for elimination. Unfortunately, we live in a toxic world and many of us are consuming and using toxic foods and products every day. These things all add up to sluggish emunctories. They get gunked up, and you get sick. Your detox program should encompass all emunctories, like opening the kidneys with water and greens, loving the liver with cruciferous vegetables, and glowing that skin with sweaty practices.


  1. Set Your Intention/Big WHY


Why do you want to detox? Because it’s trendy? Because you feel horrible? Because your friend asked you? Any good detox program won’t just focus on the food you stuff in your gob, but also your mindset. In my opinion, mindset is 80% of what’s needed for healing.


You must detox your mind as well as your body. Well-rounded detox programs will guide you through this process so you understand the real reason that you want to cleanse. This will keep you 100% focused and primed for lasting transformation- not intermittent change.


  1. PREP


Whole food detox programs often involve more cooking and food preparation than you’re used to. Prepping as much food ahead of time as possible will help you sail through the process, not to mention the money you’ll save by not purchasing stuff you don’t need. Cut your veggies up, mix a salad, make some smoothie packs or a big pot of nourishing soup. Then go about your business, grabbing these items as needed for your meals. 


Detox Tea | The Hormone Diva


Remember, you DON’T have to suffer. The programs you’ve done in the past failed you– you didn’t fail them. Inhale the future, exhale the past.



  1. Robyn

    I have done a water only fast, many times, for 1, 2, 3, 5, 7 & 14 days. I always felt wonderful & energetic! Teeth got whiter, skin cleared up, felt lighter, lost weight. Trick is to start small (skip breakfast, then breakfast & lunch, etc) and build up to longer fasts. I am doing one now, feel perfectly fine after 18 hours.

    1. Hi Robyn

      Thanks for your comment. That is great that your body is able to handle fasting, because most aren’t! Enjoy your cleansing 🙂

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